Breakthrough of sorts

Training last night might best be described as educational. I will not stoop to their level and call it a 'bad' training session. I won't. It was...informative. Interesting. A real eye-opener. I choose to think it was merely a glimpse of what I fear most - Sahara having complete and utter control over myself and my entire life. And I can move on from this. I can - I have promised myself, and Sahara, to stop being one of those 'oh, but she's so CUTE when she jumps all over your new white dress with big muddy paws/bites your ear like that when you're trying to sleep/digs holes and buries your nice new coffee mug in them" type dog owner. From now on, she will be an educated, disciplined little puppy. No more walking all over me. No more of the usual "No, you're not allowed in bed with me...ohh, go on then" and the constant giving in to her. I know she can do this - she's so naughty because she's so smart, I know it. She can learn to love me more than Phoenix, and give ME total focus. I know that, because I feed her, and I know what a giant bowl of stinky lamb and vegetable casserole does to her attention span.

See, I know it's basically all my fault. I was too busy spoiling her to really make her work, and I was too involved in getting mad at her for not doing what I asked for when I was being serious.

There is a vague glimmer of hope now that I know it's me asking for things incorrectly, rather than Sahara simply being possessed by the devil as had previously feared. I just need to work on my anger issues when she's too busy squealing with rage at Phoenix being seperated from her, and instead of thinking she's clearly demented, I must take a deep breath and really focus on what I wish her to achieve.

Shouldn't be too hard, right?